So you want to be a cruise ship musician, do you?

An ex-jazz DJ was booking and looking for a pianist and sold me on the adventure. A gig as a musician n a cruise ship? FYIMusicNews.ca has this look at what it’s really like to be trapped on a big boat with a bunch of tourists. The bedroom air conditioner is a necessity and is now installed; the room sealed tight like a stationary elevator and, when turned on, the eco-friendly container blows a cold wind much like an arctic front. I wanted the experience. That moment when anxiety materializes courtesy an incident nearly twenty years ago when I took a nine-week gig on a cruise ship called the M.S. Or is it? Let’s call her ‘Sea Princess’. I truly think it’s ancestral. I won’t go into details other than, in the end, the pay didn’t add up, and the guy wasn’t clear about the mental capacity of my lounge working partner. I was locked away with this Romanian diva who marched about like a perfumed duck, barking orders and imposing her CD on every mark. That sounds like fun. As temperatures climbed and humidity rose this past week in Toronto, my disdain for air conditioning returned with a vengeance. You gotta keep reading. If I were to locate through some DNA search primitive ancestors, I’m certain they would have lived outdoors amongst the ferns and fishes. That was cool the first 20 minutes or so, but then I relapsed into a frightful memory and spent six surreal hours chasing a deep satisfying breath. Sundream sailing around the Caribbean Sea. I’m a ‘windows open’ guy, especially at night. Then 7:30 to 8:30 before the disco crowd arrives. Any thought of living beneath ground, a cave or an enclosed shelter absent windows, would have been an anxiety-weighted existence. This is a serious head thing for me when it returns. We played the Midnight Lounge 5 – 6 pm.
So you want to be a cruise ship musician, do you?